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jedibuttercup*rubbing forehead tiredly*
You know, one thing I never appreciated about the process of writing fan-fiction, until I sat down with my aren't-I-so-clever plot-outline and my Firefly DVDs and started writing Book's Legacy, was the fact that it has a tendency of making me fall in love with every blasted character who ends up under my pen.
It's all Inara's fault. I started merrily into Chapter 6 about ten days ago, secure in my Mal-characterization and certain it wouldn't take more than the handful of days each of the previous chapters had cost me to get it written... and then I ran into a brick wall. No matter how I re-wrote, re-imagined, and re-started the scene, I was left staring at the however-many-hundred words I'd managed to produce with a jarring feeling of "this may be pretty, but it's not quite right."
Long about ten o'clock last night, with my text editor open in front of me, a ray of light suddenly made its way through the clouds of frustration. It wasn't that anything was inherently wrong with the dialogue, or even my conception of Inara's place in the Firefly-'verse; it was that I'd unconsciously kept trying to give Mal control of the scene. I blinked at it awhile, closed my eyes, and thought about how the scene might play out with a stronger Inara, who isn't terribly apologetic-- and viola, there it was! The Inara muse that had been eluding me for more than a week was suddenly right in front of me. And I wished immediately that I could climb into my story and comfort her for Mal's (naturally) negative reaction to her revelations, even though I still think they'd make a very defective couple.
Whoa, thought I, after I came to a halt several hundred words later. Where'd that come from?
Then I thought about my forays into Buffy fandom. And suddenly everything made sense.
I got into fic-writing in the first place back in 2001 all because of my wuv for Wesley Wyndam-Price, back in the days when everyone on his show hated him in the doldrums of Angel Season 3. Then, over the course of necessarily getting into other characters' heads to forward the plot of my massive (and, after 200,000 words, still not entirely complete) "Lesser Men" universe, I began to realize how very interesting each and every one of the other characters was, too. I'd say at least half of the B-verse-centric fiction I write these days is about the main Slayer herself, despite all her flaws and all the frustrations I had with her as a passive fan, because writing the characters' interactions taught me so much about her importance and her motivations and cemented her as the leading voice of that show in my mind. But that wasn't all; I found that I could no longer slam Angel while elevating Spike, nor blacken Willow while exalting Tara, nor paint over Xander's rough spots while turning my nose up at Anya's, nor any other such inequity, no matter how brilliant the concept that imbalance might support; I loved them all, warts and everything, and it had a serious effect on the way my plotting tended to unfold after that.
I think I'm a better writer for it. But occasionally, like now, it catches me off guard. I love all of Firefly to tiny bits, but even so, I've been holding an unofficial heirarchy in my mind without entirely realizing it, with Mal-River-Jayne-Kaylee at the top followed by -Wash-Zoë-Inara-Simon-Book. I tackled the Book angle deliberately with my plot to force myself to stretch a little, but my Muse seems intent on forcing me to look more closely at the other characters on the bottom rungs as well.
At this rate, before I'm done, I'll probably still be ranking them Mal-River- but every-damn-one else will probably be tied quite firmly for third. *grin*
*cracking knuckles* Chapter 7's going to be back to multi-character-interaction, not just one-on-one; hopefully, barring another unforseen Muse-block, I'll have it polished up for y'all by Friday.
You know, one thing I never appreciated about the process of writing fan-fiction, until I sat down with my aren't-I-so-clever plot-outline and my Firefly DVDs and started writing Book's Legacy, was the fact that it has a tendency of making me fall in love with every blasted character who ends up under my pen.
It's all Inara's fault. I started merrily into Chapter 6 about ten days ago, secure in my Mal-characterization and certain it wouldn't take more than the handful of days each of the previous chapters had cost me to get it written... and then I ran into a brick wall. No matter how I re-wrote, re-imagined, and re-started the scene, I was left staring at the however-many-hundred words I'd managed to produce with a jarring feeling of "this may be pretty, but it's not quite right."
Long about ten o'clock last night, with my text editor open in front of me, a ray of light suddenly made its way through the clouds of frustration. It wasn't that anything was inherently wrong with the dialogue, or even my conception of Inara's place in the Firefly-'verse; it was that I'd unconsciously kept trying to give Mal control of the scene. I blinked at it awhile, closed my eyes, and thought about how the scene might play out with a stronger Inara, who isn't terribly apologetic-- and viola, there it was! The Inara muse that had been eluding me for more than a week was suddenly right in front of me. And I wished immediately that I could climb into my story and comfort her for Mal's (naturally) negative reaction to her revelations, even though I still think they'd make a very defective couple.
Whoa, thought I, after I came to a halt several hundred words later. Where'd that come from?
Then I thought about my forays into Buffy fandom. And suddenly everything made sense.
I got into fic-writing in the first place back in 2001 all because of my wuv for Wesley Wyndam-Price, back in the days when everyone on his show hated him in the doldrums of Angel Season 3. Then, over the course of necessarily getting into other characters' heads to forward the plot of my massive (and, after 200,000 words, still not entirely complete) "Lesser Men" universe, I began to realize how very interesting each and every one of the other characters was, too. I'd say at least half of the B-verse-centric fiction I write these days is about the main Slayer herself, despite all her flaws and all the frustrations I had with her as a passive fan, because writing the characters' interactions taught me so much about her importance and her motivations and cemented her as the leading voice of that show in my mind. But that wasn't all; I found that I could no longer slam Angel while elevating Spike, nor blacken Willow while exalting Tara, nor paint over Xander's rough spots while turning my nose up at Anya's, nor any other such inequity, no matter how brilliant the concept that imbalance might support; I loved them all, warts and everything, and it had a serious effect on the way my plotting tended to unfold after that.
I think I'm a better writer for it. But occasionally, like now, it catches me off guard. I love all of Firefly to tiny bits, but even so, I've been holding an unofficial heirarchy in my mind without entirely realizing it, with Mal-River-Jayne-Kaylee at the top followed by -Wash-Zoë-Inara-Simon-Book. I tackled the Book angle deliberately with my plot to force myself to stretch a little, but my Muse seems intent on forcing me to look more closely at the other characters on the bottom rungs as well.
At this rate, before I'm done, I'll probably still be ranking them Mal-River- but every-damn-one else will probably be tied quite firmly for third. *grin*
*cracking knuckles* Chapter 7's going to be back to multi-character-interaction, not just one-on-one; hopefully, barring another unforseen Muse-block, I'll have it polished up for y'all by Friday.
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no subject
Date: 2005-11-17 09:05 am (UTC)With Firefly it took me a long, long time to get started at all, simply because I didn't have a specific favourite. I wasn't in wuv with anyone, which means the simpler plot bunnies (give your favourite what they want - or what you want them to want) weren't hopping. I'm not entirely surprised my firefly fic gene finally kicked in at the same time that I saw Serenity for the 3rd time and realised I wuv Mal.
I think that is one of the strengths of the series for me - that equal weighting and shading for each of the characters. I also suspect that is why a lot of ff fanfic leaves me unsatisfied because it doesn't capture that delicate equilibrium.
no subject
Date: 2005-11-17 09:09 am (UTC)What really kills me about Firefly is that I need more canon to figure out just about all the characters and their interactions. A few movie sequels will be lovely for that, but I'm not so hopefully I'll get them, and movies never give me enough info. I do not understand them yet, and sadly may never, and it just annoys me.
Also, I think it was season 3 that made you start loving Wes (I watched on TNT so am never certain about seasons). Angel as anti-hero was completely the reason I started watching both Angel and Buffy, but end of it all I think Wes is hands down my fav character of them all. Just all that wonderful character growth, yet somewhere in there was Wesley all along.